Monday, February 27, 2006

Democracy, Kgp ishtyle.

My name is Aithin Kaimeaystud. I am a student of the Department of Polytikal Engineering. I am from Poltupur, and I am contesting for the post of General Secretary Studpanti, Technology Students Gymkhana.

In a few weeks, the Gymkhana elections circus will get under way. Happas' chamchas will take a break from licking ass, and start building major castles in the air. Amateur non-events called hall days are organized, a few idiots doing the hard work and a few other assholes taking the credit. Soapboxes, intended to be the centrepiece of the clean elections image, degenerate into pointless mudslinging before mobs that made up their minds long ago. First years, the only ones without ulterior motives or fake loyalties, will be pestered with brotherly love and free funda to no end.

This is also the time for the most popular game in the Gymkhana calendar. Yes, it's an inter-hall. The game of inter-hall pacts.

Pacts is modelled on sumo wrestling, with one major twist. There are six contestants and seven prizes. Don't let this doesn't dampen your spirits however - some ringside action does take place, for greeds sake. Usually, however, action stops after one or two suckers get thrown out, and the rest of the contestants sit down on their fat asses and divide the prizes among themselves.

Borrowing from another form of wrestling, WWE, Pacts allows all the action to be carefully planned beforehand so that the spectators get an engaging show - but only a show.

An important manouver in inter-hall Pacts is the Snoop. The snoop is performed on your allies, not on opponents. Although illegal, the snoop is usually performed in full view of the referees (a.k.a. monitors), who either turn a blind eye or applaud the mastery of the snooper, rules be damned.

Welcome to Democracy, IIT Kgp style.

19 Comments:

Blogger A.G.Sudarshan said...

Ahhh.... the joy....

:)

27 February, 2006 22:17  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

for all those who can't have their share of fun out of this, it would obviously seem a petty and non-sense affair...but as a matter of fact there have been the epicenter of "poltupur" and have still managed to do well when they leave this place.

27 February, 2006 22:44  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

there have been people who have been the epicenter i mean

27 February, 2006 22:45  
Blogger arvin said...

@anon: of course. i'm sure they fare pretty well indeed. the only thing i'm worried is how kgp fares under them.

i dont make any sweeping statement about the capability of post holders here... some have been really good, some utterly pathetic. what i'm critisizing is the method of selection.

currently the better candi wins about 50% of the time, by pure chance. i wish we could do better with a little more ethics.

27 February, 2006 23:22  
Blogger Vaga Bond said...

hu ha ! i think its something every kgpian sud think abt . Right frm first yr i hav been wondering what is the point of the whole futile exercise wen its just a farce. We do not hav a right to critisize corruption in the government or elsewhr wen we hav ourselves perfected the art so immaculately .

28 February, 2006 03:38  
Blogger Anup Bishnoi said...

so finally you are back to blogging :))

28 February, 2006 05:23  
Blogger Dewdrop said...

good good...
have seen it for the last 3 years...n i still dont understand the hows and the whys of it all...
so elections are here again [:D]

28 February, 2006 21:30  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

have fun from it rather than thinking about the deeper meaning and all that stuff.the easiest way to change the system is by being a part of it.at the end of the day, the things aren't really that bad...some good things happen everywhere. :)

01 March, 2006 06:50  
Blogger arvin said...

@vaga: glad u agree. maybe i shuold agree with your blog too once in a while... :D

@anup: yeah, had something like a blogger reawakening. one tip for you to get through election season: buy a formidable looking padlock and practice locking your room through the window.

@dewdrop: the whys are fairly obvious... the hows, maybe too disgusting to reveal. what i don't get is: how is it worth it?

@anon: you see, i can't have fun from it. there are things in gymkhana that i'm deeply passionate about - it hurts when some incompetent ass-licker, whose sole intention throughout his tenure is making his happa happy, becomes everybody's boss.

maybe because i am not very religious, i can have all the fun i want without violating my ethics. i don't find corruption fun, sorry.

BTW nobody here will eat you for your views... you probably have the majority's opinion anyway. mind posting with your name?

01 March, 2006 07:35  
Blogger Sunny said...

:)

01 March, 2006 07:50  
Blogger pinyana said...

look mr. anonymous wants to have fun. hes got sumthing humoruos in the blog. this politics, that politics, shit politics... same thing is happening everywhere. Ex: look at our administration. there are a few who are not 'happas' or 'chamchas' or 'assholes'.

01 March, 2006 08:43  
Blogger arvin said...

@sunny: :) to you too

@pinyana: like vagabond said (just rephrasing), don't bitch about shit 10 kilometres away if you are living peacefully in a sewer.

01 March, 2006 10:47  
Blogger pinyana said...

@ bagabond ..
who does decide these rights and lefts ??
i have got the rights and lefts both to criticize anybody i like to criticize and i don't need anybody's permission.

@ aravin..
don't make assumptions like " living peacefully in a sewer ". tell me what shud i do if i do not support this "kgp democracy ishtyle". shud i go to rooftop of my hall and shout ?? or u gonna suggest somthing.

i ask u wat did u do when somebody instructed u whom to vote ?? did u slap him ??
we get the information abt the names while we stand in the queue waiting for our turn, when our turn comes we go there and encircle those names; some heard, some unheard. we do this just for the sake of our hall's fucken reputaion.

shit happens everywhere and this shit makes the swere in which we are living today.

people are commenting here tht:
the topic is hu ha...yes it is always hu ha, everything which happens in iitkgp is hu ha
everybody shud think abt it...really ?? everybody shud think abt it and after tht everybody shud attend the hall days
good good...have seen it for the last 3 year we have got great audience here!!
have fun from it ... that is wat the most appropriate here.. Have FunGo to the first year halls, irritate first yrs so that they can run to the libraries or simply hide themselves in their rooms by locking 'em from outside.
attend the hall days, participate in quizes, watch the dance competitions.....
get a piece of paper from insti called "degree" and get the hell out of here.

01 March, 2006 23:26  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sometimes we hav to settle for things that are second best. Being a part of core team, i happened to visit a lot of colleges and believe me kgp gymkhana rocks. In one nit the vp-equivalent was suspended for beating up his opponent in his room. Here students are not organised on communal or marginal lines. Well kgp rox.

03 March, 2006 08:03  
Blogger fundoome said...

you have been tagged:D.........visit my blog for details.he he he

13 March, 2006 00:49  
Blogger Abhishek Agarwal said...

Ari , m surprised u asked "How is it worth it" ... since u have been involved so closely with the gymkhana...

13 March, 2006 12:51  
Blogger arvin said...

@anon2: i know, i've studied for a year at one of those colleges. we are incredible lucky that the gymkhana elections are not overrun by politicians from outside. the authorities must be commended for keeping the likes of sfi and abvp out.

we are indeed privileged to be in an institute where everyone has a fair chance at being part of the student body; where we are not discriminated against on the basis of our political views, region, or community.

so why do we have to ruin it and introduce a most frivolous criterion for discrimination, our hall of residence?

@recca: i know why its worth it for the candis and their entourage. to become VP's, GSecs, or heads. to make ones friend or wingie one of these things.

but what about the others? what motivates someone who votes for a candi he knows is inferior, even with nothing to gain?

14 March, 2006 02:11  
Blogger aniSH... said...

Why do you think pacts are bad?
* Pacts are nothing but forming coalitions right? Coalition politics is very much allowed (and very much the order of the day) in any "democracy".And each hall in kgp is a well-oiled cadre party!
* Well "snooping" is bad. But once you form a pact, you better be a "good samaritan" and stick with your hall...:)

Also, you didn't say anything about how to overcome pacts? I don't think there is any way out. As long as "hall-tempo" remains much much more important than "kgp-tempo", pacts are here to say.

PS: Found your post in Mallu Blog Roll!.

14 March, 2006 05:36  
Blogger arvin said...

kgp pacts ensure that who gets elected has little to do with who is better, or even who people think is better. Last year, for instance, i was talking to someone after a soapbox; he was pretty open about the fact that his hall's candi makhao'd, and had bullshit for proposals. in the same breath he noted that it would hardly matter; they had the stronger pact.

of course, he was right.

pacts depend on snooping. snooping is the only way to enforce a pact. make snooping impossible, pacts become irrelevant.

14 March, 2006 12:15  

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